“I have a baby”

A friend of mine, who knows about my struggle with IVF and adoption stuff, can be somewhat of an arse.  Today, he was trying to get out of some work thing we all hate, but we all have to go to. When I said, “why do you think you don’t have to go?”  He replied, “I have a baby.”

I laughed and told him that he also had a stay at home wife and to get over his self.

What I should have said was:

I had to go to this exact same function last year, with my purse full of tampons and pads that were barely keeping the menstruation cylce that I’d paid $15,000 for from ruining my clothes and announcing my failure to get pregnant to the world, all while trying not to cry and smiling at everyone’s lame jokes and mild complaints about being there.

Okay, so I guess my first reply was better.  But sometimes, writing mean thoughts down helps.

I saw a quote today at yoga that I’m going to try to remember:  “Before you speak, ask yourself, Is is kind? Is it necessary?  Does it improve the silence?”  Seems like a good thing to remember.  Now, if i could just keep my brain from thinking snarky replies.

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6 thoughts on ““I have a baby”

  1. Meh, I think snarky remarks are ok in the brain. Honestly, sometimes my brain snark is highly therapeutic, as long as they stay on the inside 🙂 That said, I do lve that yoga quote and should put it around my house as a reminder to my husband and I (and the cats – if only they could read!)

  2. He does sound like a bit of an ass! I can never think of witty comebacks to people like that. Or if I do, it’s 2am the next day and my comeback is useless! Love the quote!!

  3. i agree. husband’s of SAHWs definitelys dont get to use that excuse. some of them even have their #@$^%$%@ dinners are cooked for them, work clothes ironed, lunches packed, asses wiped, noses blown… (little bitter on this topic, can ya tell?!).

    hope he manned up and went to the lame work event and that is was tolerable for you!

  4. I’ve seen versions of that quote before — “Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?” and yes, it’s something to strive for in your actual speech, but I don’t think it’s in any way necessary to police your thought-snark! Seriously, people need to get over themselves. I hope this guy sucked it up and went to the boring event with everyone else. Is there at least liquor at your boring work events?

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