So, I googled my RE’s name today, like I’ve done a bunch of times before, but this time, I noticed these review websites. My RE totally has a bunch of negative reviews. I mean, A LOT. My experience has been mostly okay I guess. The IVF lady who calls is not very smart (and she’s definitely not a nurse, my nurse DH says). They practically kept me in the dark and wouldn’t answer even when I asked direct questions. The reasoning seemed to be that less information = less worry. I just don’t know about that. I see plenty of people write and post lots of information, including their POSITIVE BETA result!
I know, I know. I’m upset. My IVF didn’t work. My IUI didn’t work. My two medicated cycles didn’t work. I’m 21 months and who knows how many cycles (26 maybe?) into trying to get pregnant. I’m $10,000 less financially viable and I’m still not pregnant. I’m just plain not pregnant.
Dammit. Dammit. Dammit. Why? That’s the real anger/answer. I want to know why. I guess I think if I know why then I can I fix it.
But maybe I’m just not fixable. We have the failed IVF appointment on Sept 23. I guess I’ll find out just how broken I am then.